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Greatness Gained from The Grind

March 18th, 2019

"It is easy to get discouraged when what you work for isn’t materializing fast enough. Don’t get distracted focusing on the goal and miss the greatness gained from the grind. Amazing things are happening at every step of your journey, see them. Take a deep appreciative breath & smile. Happiness is found in the now."


Ok Universe, I get it. This is the second time a message like the above has shown itself to me within a day. Why? Because I’m getting caught up in thinking I should be farther along towards my goals, and not concentrating on reminding myself to breathe & enjoy exactly where I am right now. And to not feel frustrated I’m not further along – that will come. Don’t get distracted focusing on the goal and miss the greatness gained from the grind. You see, there’s a lot of uncertainty in my life at this moment. Which is pretty awesome. And it’s definitely a new place for me to live. My body and my mind are reacting to the change much stronger than I had anticipated. Which can be pretty intimidating. Although I’ve never been one to take the “typical” route in life, somehow it always ended up “safe”. I think mainly because although I knew I never wanted a typical life, it ended there. I had never asked myself what I truly wanted in life and so I began to live someone else’s. I was always working under someone else’s structure, someone else’s rules. And that worked, until it didn’t.


Once I quit drinking, and the fog began to clear, I realized how much not only a “typical” life wasn’t for me, but a “safe” life wasn’t either. Someone else's structure, someone else's rules. I needed to find my own passion, something that I believed in so strongly it would propel me forward in life. Now, I feel as though I’ve found that – well those – passions, and I’m more fucking excited than ever to get out of bed & plan & create & connect. And I can tend to get a little ahead of myself in all of that – Vata Mind.


But guess what, I’m also scared too. Again, this is the first time that I’m doing any of this. Breaking out on my own. And I have awesome support within my life, there’s just a little devil of fear on my shoulder that has THE most perfect timing, showing up to whisper sweet nothings in my ear - “you’re not good enough”, “fuck you.”


Hmmm, thing is, ‘”FUCK YOU”. To quote someone very meaningful to me - "I know too much". I know that by going against my gut feeling, my intuition, that little voice inside my soul telling me to take the leap, that I promise you’re going to be OK - better than fucking OK - that I have no choice now but to live up to the potential of who I am supposed to be, and what my mission is in my lifetime. And not listening to that to me is scarier than taking that leap of faith and following my intuition. And at the end of the day, what an amazing opportunity I’ve given myself to reinvent, to help, to inspire.


So through this, I have 2 choices – I can pack up Vivify, and my Ayurvedic studies and saunter back to my “safe” job, tail between my legs. Or I can run towards & through. And remind myself how important each & every moment is I'm living. And how important is it to record these moments in writing so I can look back one day and see how far I've come. Every day I’m learning new ways to live, to connect, to listen, to inspire and to have compassion for myself & my journey through. My structure. My rules. There is greatness gained from the grind. xo - K


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